As of late, my friends and I have had a thing for red velvet cupcakes from one of our favorite local spots. Last night we were hanging out and got one of our red velvet cravings so we drove on over there and treated ourselves! No feelings of guilt or shame, just pure enjoyment of the yummy treats that life has to offer.
I don’t know about you, but shame and guilt are two things I have associated with food for many years. Whether it be a cupcake, chocolate or any other of my favorite treats, the fear of getting “fat” was usually quite gripping. If I did eat the treat, I usually felt pretty bad either because I “blew” my calorie count for that day or because what I ate was “unhealthy”. So the fact that I ate each scrumptious bite of cupcake last night and felt absolutely no shame or guilt was a huge step for me. (I haven’t felt shame or guilt with food for a while, but last night was when I realized that those feelings were completely gone).
Imagine living a life where food is not the enemy but instead is meant to be enjoyed. What would that look like for you? No more counting calories, no more feeling bad for having a bite of chocolate, no more constant restriction with every single thing you ate.
So here it is, Rule #17: Eat and enjoy food! I realize that this concept might be basic for you veterans, but for those of you who are still associating food with guilt, you really don’t have to do that anymore. Stop associating food with guilt and instead learn to enjoy what life has to offer. Your eyes will be opened to a whole new world if you just let yourself live.
yummm….hey I was wondering….I love “red velvet” cakes too, but what exactly is it that makes them red velvet? They do taste pretty much like premium chocolate, and the ‘red’ isn’t really a flavor like cherry or strawberry…what is up with that? *haha!* also I believe ‘red velvet’ is more common in some parts of the US than others…mysterious…!
You wouldn’t happen to know where I can find a red velvet cake recipe, would you? (now I’m thinking it would be nice to eat some cake today…)
I still struggle with enjoying bananas, which is sad because I love them on my cereal. Fortunately, and oddly enough, those are one the only foods that I still feel guilt over. That damned Atkins diet!
I really, REALLY needed to read this.
Right now.
Thank you.
mmmm Red Velvet. Do you really think they tate like chocolate? I don’t. Though they do have some coco powder in them.
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How did you get to this point? Any suggestions for someone who is really struggling with this?
Nice rule. I eat steak almost daily. Personally, I prefer a good churrasco. No guilt!
Applause! Applause! You are really helping people.
Dee,
It’s really hard work. What made a difference for me was changing my internal dialogue. Every time I would start “telling” myself you shouldn’t eat that/it’s bad for you/eat less, I would replace it with, I’m allowed to eat this/as much as I want/etc. I also did that in regard to my body. If I started thinking you’re too fat/lumpy/double chin/whatever I would immediately stop myself and think something positive instead.
Any suggestions for someone who is really struggling with this?
Read Junkfood Science a LOT. That’s what helped me, but I was a mild case to begin with. Never counted calories, only thought of some foods as “bad.” However, I’m glad that I can enjoy ice cream again.
Ditto on Citizen Cane’s comment: “Nice Rule” I love food, love to cook it and LOVE to eat it even more. Used to worry about all those calories and all that high pressure body image stuff. I’m so thankful I’ve moved on.
I love your blog and how you are helping others. Keep it up please!
I have seen Paula Deen make a red velvet cake, which seems to be big in the South. It is basically, as I recall, a white or yellow cake with red food coloring to make it red velvet, & she only put in one or two teaspoons of cocoa, so I am not sure what the point of the cocoa is, as I would think one couldn’t taste it much. Perhaps one could find he recipe at the Food Network website.
Enjoying food without guilt is one of the most important & most difficult things we can do for ourselves, especially since the culture tries harder every day to keep us from doing so. Congratulations to all who have made it & good vibes to everyone working on it.
food was created to enjoy. there are so many tastes, textures, and flavors out there, that itd be a shame to miss out on them because of misperceptions.
food is not inherently bad, its not the enemy. society is too concerned (slash borderline obsessive) about pointing fingers and finding something or someone to blame for the “obesity problem” but what about all the other problems that exist today. things that really are inherently bad like world hunger, the neverending war in iraq, the ever increasing price of oil, the exploitation of 3rd world countries, and all the other turmoil that goes on around us while we are busy beating ourselves up for eating a banana, or a cupcake, or anything else we’ve deemed “bad”.
i consider myself blessed that i dont experience these things on a daily basis but that on a daily basis i can enjoy any kind of food my appetite desires- cupcakes or cheeseburgers.
perhaps one way to break the “bad” mentality that we have towards certain foods (or food in general) is to focus on the good when were eating them (like a unique flavor, or the opportunity to decide what you want to eat and actually be able to have it). its so hard to break habits and even harder to create new routines, but its definitely possible (esp. with a lil help from our friends at EAC).
Thats what I am ALL about. Eating for enjoyment. yes. Just remember the french have cream and butter and all sorts of ‘bad’ foods with everything but they are a very healthy nation.
How do you not feel guilty over food, chocolate, etc but remain healthy? I guess the guilt bit is the only way I’ve controlled my eating over time and since I’ve struggled with being overweight my whole life . . . I just don’t get how you balance it . . .
I’ve been reading and soaking up your blog here . . . hope I’m not a lurker, but quite possibly I am. I’m digging a lot of what you’re saying and I thank you for you educated and well communicated ideas and opinions. Its good to hear this side without tearing down and bashing others. Much better way to get a point across that to cuss out the opposing view.
Thanks again and God bless!
I want some yummy cupcakes now!!! hehe